Blotter O’ The Week:

Responding to a domestic disturbance call, officers found a woman punching her husband in the chest. The man said she got angry when he accused her of cheating, and she allegedly “removed a tampon from her genitals and struck the victim in the face with it, stating ‘How can I be cheatin’ and my period is on.'” She also allegedly attempted to hit him with a vase and bit him several times.

An employee of a local beverage distribution company reported that someone broke into her company car, stealing a GPS unit, along with two bottles of Grey Goose Vodka and two bottles of Corzo Tequila. If we had that much to drink, we’d need a voice from a little box to guide us home, too.

Items Stolen This Week: Five iPods, three bikes, and 12 GPS units.

A man who allegedly hit a parking meter and a palm tree told officers he took heroin and several tablets of Oxycodone and was on the way to a drug rehabilitation clinic when the accident happened.

Police were patrolling the Battery near 5 a.m. last week when they found a pile of clothes, including a cell phone and a wallet with a military ID. Officers could not find anyone in the vicinity, but there were reports more than an hour later of a man running around the Battery in his underwear.

Reflection O’ The Week: “If I could do this all over again … I’d spit on all of you.”

Theft O’ The Week: Officers saw someone suspicious walking between cars in a parking lot. A pat down revealed 24 packs of chewing gum, 47 cigarette lighters, and 47 packs of Goody’s headache powder. While the clerk at a nearby gas station recognized the man, she said she did not remember him stealing anything and refused to press charges.

An off-duty officer was in the drive-thru lane at McDonald’s when a woman allegedly cut him off in line. He asked her what she was doing and an argument ensued. After she got her food, she got out of her car and approached the officer with a phone in her hand. When he told her he would call the police, she allegedly replied, “Oh, no. I’m not talking to the police. I’m talking to my boyfriend and he’s coming to get you.” She left before on-duty officers arrived.

The Blotter is taken from City of Charleston police department reports. We’ve added a cartoon and a little commentary. We’ve added a little humor, too. No one has been found guilty. This is not a court of law.

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