Blotter o’ the Week: A man became angry with a bank teller after she refused to cash a check that was made out to his wife who is not a customer of the bank. Another bank employee came over to calm the man down, and the man responded by chest-bumping the employee five times, pushing him into an office in the process.

A man walked into a convenience store late at night and asked the cashier for a pack of cigarettes. While the cashier was turned around, the man snatched a donation cup off the counter that was meant for a muscular dystrophy charity and hid it in his jacket. It contained about $10.

Police stopped a juvenile who had a 6-inch steak knife hanging out of his sweatshirt. The boy said he used the knife to cut palmetto fronds for making palmetto roses. The officer arrested him on a charge of carrying a concealed knife.

An employee at a car dealership says that someone stole four “extremely rare” tires and rims from behind a locked gate at the dealership. The four wheel sets were valued at $1,000 apiece.

Stolen From Homes This Week: Two gold necklaces with name plates, a digital camera, a $2,400 camera lens, two gold-colored rings, three gold-colored bracelets, a wooden jewelry box, an 8-gig flash drive, a $350 pair of sunglasses, and three silverware sets worth a combined $65,000.

Security staff at a department store watched as a woman with purple curlers in her hair crammed two leather jackets, two pairs of sport pants, and five shirts into two bags she was carrying. The woman was detained and arrested for what turned out to be her second shoplifting charge.

A man called police to report that his car was missing. He said he drove to a bar that night to “blow off some steam” and then, against his better judgment, started driving home. After realizing he was too drunk to drive, he says he pulled his car over. He says he does not know how he got home from there, but he still had the keys to his car, he had made no calls on his cell phone, and he had made no charges on his credit cards.

Somebody stole from a truck an out-of-state license plate with the letters NYREDNK on it.

When a police officer busted a man with about a gram of marijuana in his pocket, the man informed the officer that it was “good stuff to get high on, really high on.”

Returning home the day after Thanksgiving from his parents’ house, a man discovered that someone had broken into his house and taken a few Black Friday five-finger discounts. He was missing two laptop computers, a 39-inch TV, a Blu-ray player, a Playstation 3, and a 12-gauge semiautomatic shotgun.

Threat o’ the Week: “Give me back my kitten now, or I’m going to hit you.” No need to get catty.

A witness called police to report that someone had plugged a 5-million-volt stun gun into an outlet on a light pole and then got in a car and drove away. An officer arrived and confiscated the device.

Sag Bust o’ the Week: While patting a man down, an officer felt some crinkly plastic bags in the man’s boxer shorts, noting that the boxers were “draped over the offender’s pants.” The officer removed the bags from the saggy boxers, and it turned out they contained marijuana, cocaine, and crack cocaine.

A man says he met a stranger online, and they talked to each other for a few weeks before he invited the stranger over to his house. While the man was in the shower, the stranger stole $100 out of the man’s purse and took a backpack containing his laptop computer. The victim only knew the stranger’s nickname.

A drawbridge operator saw four men ride up on bikes to the parking lot beside the bridge and throw a rock through the window of his car. He shined a spotlight down on them and yelled at them to get away from the vehicle, and then he saw a big flash and the men riding away. Nothing appeared to have been stolen from his vehicle, and no ammo casings were found on the scene.

Weed Stash o’ the Week: In a plastic bag marked “Papaya.” (Fun fact: According to the marijuana information website, papaya is a hybrid cannabis strain with a flavor that is “similar to its tropical fruit counterpart, but a spicy, peppery side also becomes apparent.”)

After stealing a bike that had been left unlocked, a man was confronted by the bike’s owner. The thief reportedly said, “Is this your bike?” and then rode away on it. No pangs of conscience for this guy.

A patron at a bar walked into the manager’s office and stole a $160 bottle of Knob Creek bourbon along with a bottle of Pappy Van Winkle’s Family Reserve and a bottle of Old Rip Van Winkle’s Handmade Bourbon worth $700 apiece. When the manager caught the patron, he had one bottle in his front pants pocket, one under his right arm, and one under his shirt.

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