Blotter O’ The Week:

A woman reported that her boyfriend had poured bong water on her while she was sleeping, punched her in the back with what she thinks may have been brass knuckles, and pushed her down a flight of stairs beftore he fled the scene.

Clown Car O’ the Week: A West Ashley man reporting a hit and run told police that a Jeep ran off the road and hit his fence and that “numerous males” exited the vehicle before getting back in and speeding away.

Threat O’ The Week: “I have a loaded pistol in the truck. Don’t think I’m not crazy enough to use it.”

A man quickly checked out of a West Ashley hotel after parents by the pool complained that he was taking pictures from his room window of their daughters. The man told hotel management that he was taking pictures of scenery, but then said he never took any pictures. We blame Vanity Fair.

A man being questioned at Johns Island Park about narcotics found in his truck told officers that he would cooperate because he didn’t want his boss to find out that A) he was using illegal drugs and B) he was fishing on the clock.

Potentially Misread Gesture O’ The Week: Victims told police that a man made gestures that suggested he had a pistol in the front waist band of his shorts. Hey, he could have just been happy to see you.

A drunk man found at the corner of Meeting and Romney streets told police that he thought he was on Isle of Palms. If you don’t find this funny, you’ve either never been on IOP or the corner of Meeting and Romney.

The Blotter is taken from City of Charleston police department reports. We’ve added a cartoon and a little commentary. We’ve added a little humor, too. No one has been found guilty. This is not a court of law.