The Blotter is taken from City of Charleston police department reports. We’ve added a cartoon and a little commentary. We’ve added a little humor, too. No one has been found guilty. This is not a court of law.

Blotter Quote O’The Week:
“I done smoked it all, but you can frisk me if you want to,” said a man to a cop last week, while reeking of pot and standing near the door of a Market Street luxury hotel. The cop did frisk the man but found nothing, and eventually had to remove the man by force. He should’ve just lured the man off the doorstep with a bag of Fritos.

On March 27, the manager of a Meeting Street discount store stopped a woman apparently attempting to steal a $6 pair of shoes. Like $6 for shoes isn’t a steal already.

Cops pulled over a Crown Victoria on King Street on March 27 for playing loud music. An officer noticed the smell of pot emanating from the car, and asked the driver and all of the passengers to get out. The cop asked a backseat passenger if he could search him, and the man said, “I don’t have any drugs on me.” The officer then found a baggie of pot and four crack rocks. Hey, wait a minute, cops drive Crown Vics. Hmm…

Cops arrested an Addlestone Avenue man on March 24 with $1,320 in cash and a cigar box filled with $10,000 worth of crack, $250 worth of cocaine, and three ecstasy pills on him. Cigar box? Dude, spring for a safety deposit box.

On March 28, cops patrolling Romney Street recovered a fully-loaded .45-caliber automatic pistol, 17 grams of crack, and 6 grams of cocaine from four men they arrested at a nearby playground. Remember the days when getting “too high” meant swinging upside down?

Cops arrested a man on March 24 near the corner of Reid and Nassau streets for whipping out his dong and urinating on some trash cans in front of some kids. When cops placed him into custody, the man yelled, “I just got off work, and I was taking a piss.” Ain’t it just like The Law to take the piss out of the working man?