The Blotter is taken from City of Charleston police department reports. We’ve added a cartoon and a little commentary. We’ve added a little humor, too. No one has been found guilty. This is not a court of law.

On April 1, a Lockhaven Boulevard man told police he shot himself in the hand while he was in the process of cleaning his .40-caliber handgun, but forgot that he’d left a round in the chamber. Police found the magazine in the man’s night-stand and the gun on his sofa. Incidentally, the gun had one round in it, and cops couldn’t find a spent shell case or any gun-cleaning supplies. Talk about your April fool.

Misspellings O’The Week:
“illeagally,” “arguement,” “stateing”

Cops were called to a Peyton Street home on March 31, where two sisters were in a fight in which one girl hit her sister in the face with a coffee mug. The blow caused swelling under her left eye and cuts to her face. Both women declined to press charges, but an officer suggested they stay at their parents’ home. Maybe they should try decaf.

On April 2, a man stopped under the I-26 overpass near Huger Street to roll a cigarette. As he sat down, another man approached him and demanded the dollar bill he saw sticking out of the smoker’s pocket. The smoker refused, so the angered vagrant pulled a long piece of metal out of his bedroll/backpack and swung it like a sword, hitting the man’s head, left forearm, and left knee. There can be only one immortal, Highlander!