The Blotter is taken from City of Charleston police department reports. We’ve added a cartoon and a little commentary. We’ve added a little humor, too. No one has been found guilty. This is not a court of law.

On August 14, two men entered a Sam Ritt. fast food joint and jumped over the counter with handguns. They rounded up the employees and forced them to lie on the floor while they grabbed cellphones and wallets, pistol-whipped a female employee, and took money from the store’s safe.

Blotter Threat O’ The Week: “I’m going to fucking kill you.”

Some friends returned to a parking lot on Rutledge Street from playing kickball in Hampton Park to find their cars broken into. Out of one car, thieves took a straw purse containing an American Express card, Visa card, a Blackberry 7550, a Victoria’s Secret charge card, Express charge card, a pink Motorola Razr, and apparently the livelihood of Hilary Duff.

Blotter Unnecessary Confession O’ The Week: “I got high about 15 minutes ago.”