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Blotter o’ the week: A woman asked officers to conduct a welfare check on her son, who was at the Apple store trying to buy $6,000 worth of products because he believed President Trump was calling him and sending him messages.

A man heard a neighbor screaming, “Someone is trying to kill me.” Apparently, a man described as “black or white” tried to break into his neighbor’s house, and he smashed his window trying to defend himself with a wooden stick.

A recently-installed fence on Spring Street was cut straight down the middle. The property owner thinks the operators of a food truck that uses the spot may have done it to make it easier for them to drive out.

A travel bag containing a MacBook, a $1,000 drone, and a $4,000 camera was stolen from the trunk of a man’s car, which was parked on the third floor of a city garage. There were no signs of forced entry.

A woman deposited $8,000 into a bank account after she was told she could win a new Mercedes and $7,000 a week, for life, if she just paid taxes on the car. Upon finding this out, her daughter-in-law froze her bank account and advised her to call the police.

A man ran out of a King Street nacho joint without paying his $12.50 tab. He told an officer that he thought his friend had paid, and that he only ran because he didn’t want to deal with the hassle.

A man who sat in front of a closed downtown eatery began running down a residential street and screaming loudly after officers tried to detain him for providing false information.

A man walked into a James Island grocery store, stopped at the in-store café, and peed on the merchandise on display, according to surveillance footage.

The manager of a West Ashley pizza joint offered to order an Uber for an intoxicated customer. After trying to get her out for 30 minutes, an officer showed up. She called him an asshole, and was subsequently placed under arrest for refusing to leave upon request.

A guy approached police and said he had just been punched in the nose by a man at a King Street bar, who was identified through his Instagram account as a College of Charleston student with a dirty blonde ponytail and a very distinctive tattoo of “moon faces” on his tricep.

A woman was fined $2,125 for stealing $565 worth of merchandise, including a $128 dress, from a West Ashley department store.

After being informed of the instructions for a field sobriety test, a woman replied, “Oh my god, really? I couldn’t do this sober.”