Steve Stegelin

Blotter o’ the week: On three separate occasions in the last few weeks, a golf club was used to break through a car’s window and the club was left inside the vehicle. Further research shows a typical set contains 12 clubs, which means we have about nine weeks left.

A man was found urinating in public on Ann Street, which police describe as “a popular location for urinating.” We had no idea the police department was collaborating with the visitors bureau.

Gasoline was siphoned from the bus of a West Ashley adult daycare center. The driver found a copper pipe, likely used to steal the gasoline, next to the vehicle’s broken gas cap, and the bus had significantly less fuel than the day before. Schools really must be getting desperate for funding.

A worker at a Daniel Island business was accused of embezzlement when an account found that she was being paid $20 an hour as opposed to $15 an hour, what she was hired for. The complainant stated that the offender learned how to use the business payroll and changed her paycheck. When confronted, the offender stated she “paid herself what she thought she was worth.” What’s wrong with this? She just has high self-esteem.

Two cameras, a bottle of Adderall, a handgun, and a bedroom closet shelf were stolen from a West Ashley home. You can really learn a lot about a person from what’s stolen. A camera and ADHD meds — they focus. Another camera and a gun — they shoot things. A closet shelf — they stay organized for burglars.

A downtown parking meter had $20 in coins stolen from it earlier this month. The police report got our hopes up initially though, labeling it as a “theft from a coin-operated machine or device.” Those claw machines have it coming.

A Charleston woman had her truck stolen by her ex-boyfriend and his friend while they were helping her move out. She told officers there were only three places where the men could be headed: Georgia, Alabama, or Texas. No mention on if the woman is a country music songwriter.

An officer claimed to be able to identify the smell of alcohol due to his “prior training, knowledge, and experience.” Reporter’s note: Maybe I should become a cop?

Officers responded to a downtown store in response to a shoplifting. The thief was described as wearing a pink/red plaid shirt and jeans, who grabbed items from a table of jeans and a box of sunglasses before fleeing the store. Really should have just gone for a new shirt though.

A man driving his black Honda Accord down King Street was sideswiped by what he described as a light-colored sedan with a raised hood ornament. Tag searches later pointed to a 1988 Rolls Royce. Not sure if the Rolls driver was its owner, but the phrase, “Drive it like you stole it,” seems relevant here.

An officer had to take evasive maneuvers on the one-way Ashley River bridge when they noticed a pair of headlights coming toward them in their lane. After dodging the car and pulling the vehicle over, police reported the driver said they hadn’t been drinking that night. Sure.

The owner of a vehicle found a bullet hole in the passenger side of his vehicle and the shell casing in his backseat. Police filed it as vandalism, which seems pretty optimistic.