Police pulled over a woman for drifting in and out of her lane on Maybank Highway, also soon discovering an active warrant for her arrest. Turns out they also found a backpack in the backseat chock full of illegal drugs, including a brick of “gray death,” and cash. So, probs don’t need that warrant anyway.

Roughly $30 in change was stolen from a woman’s car after it had parked on the side of a downtown street. Like they say, the cost of parking downtown has gone up.

They laid low for a while, but the serial pressure washer thief has struck again, this time pilfering the pressure-powered appliance from the trunk of a white Mazda 3 parked outside of a West Ashley home. Not even a pressure washer can clean this thief’s record.

The evils of social media make themselves known once again: After blocking a former flame’s number, a West Ashley woman said the disgruntled ex stopped by, forcibly took her phone and casually strolled away. He apparently said he would bring it back, but since this is a police report, it doesn’t seem like he followed through.

Police approached a “known vagrant” downtown after receiving reports of multiple people drinking in public. When officers advised him of his court date for his open container violation, he said, “It would just be thrown out.” Tempting fate, man.

A West Ashley woman said she found a carton of cigarettes in a parking lot and didn’t know about the small baggie of cocaine that officers found inside. But wait! You won’t believe it. It worked.

A West Ashley man admitted to police he was on probation for an attempted murder in 2010 after officers found a large handgun on his person when searching for drugs. Props for the honesty, guy. But cool it with the guns, please?

A man who was being given a field sobriety test told police that he counts to 30 like this: “One, two, three … ” and so on. You know the only time a grown adult would explain how to count to another adult? Drunk.

One officer on patrol in West Ashley noticed a black Dodge Charger with a blacked-out windshield. After pulling him over, the officer discovered the driver’s active warrant and a small bag of marijuana stuffed into the driver’s sock. If we had a nickel for every time police reported that a dude in a black Dodge Charger did something illegal, we could probably afford our own Dodge Charger. We’re thinking “octane red.”