Blotter o’ the week: A woman who appeared to be pregnant walked into a West Ashley hair supply store and stuffed two wigs down her shirt.

You know it’s fall when someone shatters your back windshield with a pumpkin.

A man dropped his backpack off at the register, walked into a downtown discount store, and walked out with two cans of Vienna sausages valued at $1.10. A strange standoff ensued when he came back in for his bag; the clerk refused to take off the backpack until the man coughed up the cans.

When an officer handed a man a citation for drinking in public, the offender threw it on the sidewalk, saying, “I don’t need it, I’m not going to court.”

A group of high schoolers threw a can of white paint at the sidewalk, smothering the driver’s side of a man’s Mazda in the process.

A man punched his pregnant ex-girlfriend in the eye after she refused to have sex with him.

According to CPD’s Urban Dictionary, “the police” can also mean “(a snitch).”

A high schooler was booked and lodged in county jail after a school resource officer caught him with his older brother’s ADHD meds.

A man was found passed out on top of a case of water in front of a Johns Island convenience store. When an officer approached him, he said his name was “Big Nate and that is all there is to know” and that he was “high and drunk.”

A man stole two watches, one valued at $2,950 and another valued at $790, from a display case inside a downtown hotel.

A middle school student began stabbing himself in the hand with a pencil during a math lesson. In his math paper, he wrote, “I hurt myself because I love pain.” While alone in a different room with a teacher, he stabbed her with a pencil twice and punched her in the eye.

In light of the recent Pittsburgh synagogue shooting, a local rabbi reported an angry Facebook post that mentioned her and the mayor of Charleston to the police. “If the Jews had rifles in 1942, a lot fewer of them would have ended up as ashes in the crematoria of Auschwitz, Dachau, etc,” the post read in part.