• A Serbian hospital bans “grumpiness, gossiping, mini-skirts, and rudeness.” Surprisingly, there was no mention of banning proms in the lobby or “Chasing Cars.”

Kristen Dunst is in rehab. With all these stars in rehab, the next season of “Dancing With The Stars” is going to have to be filmed from the community room at Betty Ford.

• Lonely and desperate as Valentine’s Day approaches? Wondering whether your local escort takes VISA? Well, Congress is getting ready to put some cash in your hand. Don’t spend it all in one place.

• Feast to Famine: Cat with five legs has two removed.