Today began with promise. There was no headache. There was no urge to bathe my eyes in Milk of Magnesia. There was no reason to drop two aspirin, three Advil, four Alka-Seltzers, and a half-dozen Extra Strength Tums in the john and guzzle. I felt great.

And that strange feeling was made even better by the fact that Clemson University announced that they were holding a press conference on the Howard’s Rock incident. Finally, my fellow Tiger fans and I would have our justice. The asshole who took a hammer to this most sacred of Clemson artifacts would be punished.

At that point, it looked like the day was only going to get better. By the time I put my head on the pillow sometime in the early a.m., who knows what other gifts the day had to give.

Perhaps I’d be diagnosed with luckemia. Perhaps I’d be asked to run for president of the Intergalactic Federation of Guys Who Get Free Drinks for Life. Perhaps I’d get a sext from Lindsey Graham begging me to come over for a midnight meal of ham biscuits. But sadly that was not be. In fact, my day turned to shit.

The Post and Courier reports:

Clemson University police announced Friday afternoon an arrest of 18-year-old Micah Rogers of Pisgah Forest, N.C., in connection with the Howard’s Rock vandalism earlier this month…

Captain Eric Hendricks made the announcement Friday night, saying the suspect was identified by a witness.

Because Rogers’ white truck has a Clemson Tiger Paw sticker, and his home had Clemson paraphernalia, police believe Rogers’ motive was not that of a rival fan.

Ugh. This is even more embarrassing than losing to South Carolina four fucking years in a row. Thanks, pal.