Everyone knows that the internet was created for porn. So, why do we get so uptight about others finding out about our onscreen proclivities (legal only, of course)?

That question is not for us to answer. Regardless of whether your tastes run toward boobs, butts, or bondage, here’s a few tips on how to clean up after yourself if you’re worried about a parent, spouse, roommate, or sig oth tracking your tawdry trail. Most of these apply to Microsoft’s Internet Explorer browser; if you’re smart and using a Mac, the solution is as simple as opening your Safari browser, going to “Safari” on the menu, and clicking on “Reset Safari.”

1. The easiest way to be sure your machine is clean is to purchase a browser cleaner online. The one that appears to have the highest safety rating is Evidence Eliminator (www.evidence-eliminator.com). There are numerous others, including Clean Browser (www.cleanbrowser.com), File Sniper (www.filesniper.com), and History Kill (www.historykill.com) — but don’t take this advice as solid proof that these programs are legit and foolproof. (Hey, we’re not the ones feeling guilty about our porn habit.)

2. If you’re looking to clean up manually, it’s a fairly simple process (as long as the person you’re worried about finding your porn isn’t a hacker or a government agent).

Click on the “Tools” drop-down menu at the top of the browser screen.

Select “Internet Options.”

When the window pops up, click the “General” tab.

In the “Temporary Internet Files” section, click “Delete Cookies” (which gets rid of cookies that may have been placed on your hard drive by adult sites) and then “Delete Files” (removes temporary or cached files of webpages you’ve visited).

At the bottom of the “General” tab, look for the “History” section. Click “Clear History” and voila! No evidence!

(Addendum: If the computer you’re on has AutoComplete turned on, meaning that all your dirty search terms will pop up automatically the next time someone uses Google, after you’ve cleaned everything else, on the “Internet Options” menu, click the “Content” tab, then the “AutoComplete” button. Then hit “Clear Forms.” Go back to Google and double-check to make sure you’re golden.)

So there you go, how to keep your internet fetishes safe and private. You’ll have to find a hiding place for those Girls Gone Wild videos on your own, though…