It’s like Al Parish, without all the amusing crap.

Federal authorities accused a former Mount Pleasant stockbroker Monday of a Ponzi scheme that defrauded at least 20 investors out of more than $1 million in a four-year period.

Peninger repaid investors with funds received from new investors and issued fraudulent account statements to reflect positive returns on investment, the suit claims. He also used the money to fund business ventures and cover personal expenses, the commission alleges.

No, seriously, if there are gnomes this time around, I’m picking one up for sure.