The headline’s a joke. Mitt Romney doesn’t support inappropriate touching any more than he supports gay rights (ha! ‘nother joke). But recent negative campaign material inadvertently suggests that’s the case. The news came from Mitt’s campaign yesterday that, unlike Democratic presidential candidate Barack Obama, Romney doesn’t support sex education for kindergartners.

Sen. Barack Obama: Sex Education … For kindergartners?

Sen. Barack Obama recently told planned parenthood he supports sex education for kindergartners.

It’s based on an ABC News story.

ABC News’ Teddy Davis and Lindsey Ellerson Report: Sen. Barack Obama, D-Ill., told Planned Parenthood Tuesday that sex education for kindergarteners, as long as it is “age-appropriate,” is “the right thing to do.”

Actually, Obama is for “age-appropriate sex education,” which puts these kids far short of putting condoms on bananas. Can’t really blame Mitt for being vague, though. The ABC story waits till the backend of the story to explain Obama’s stance.

When Obama’s campaign was asked by ABC News to explain what kind of sex education Obama considers “age appropriate” for kindergarteners, the Obama campaign pointed to an Oct. 6, 2004 story from the Daily Herald in which Obama had “moved to clarify” in his Senate campaign that he “does not support teaching explicit sex education to children in kindergarten. . . The legislation in question was a state Senate measure last year that aimed to update Illinois’ sex education standards with ‘medically accurate’ information . . . ‘Nobody’s suggesting that kindergartners are going to be getting information about sex in the way that we think about it,’ Obama said. ‘If they ask a teacher ‘where do babies come from,’ that providing information that the fact is that it’s not a stork is probably not an unhealthy thing. Although again, that’s going to be determined on a case by case basis by local communities and local school boards.’”

In addition to local schools informing kindergarteners that babies do not come from the stork, the state legislation Obama supported in Illinois, which contained an “opt out” provision for parents, also envisioned teaching kindergarteners about “inappropriate touching,” according to Obama’s presidential campaign. Despite Obama’s support, the legislation was not enacted.