When I moved off to college and had cable for the first time in my life, I made four new friends. Their names are Carrie, Miranda, Charlotte, Samantha, and my, are they lovely ladies. They taught me the ways of expensive shoes, STD-free promiscuity, and getting paid to pretend you’re friends with people — (cough, Kim Cattrall, cough) — you don’t actually like. And let’s not forget cosmopolitans. But having only been 21 for about five months now and a poor college student to boot, I haven’t actually ever had one. Unfortunately, I can’t drink any cosmos while publicly watching the Sex and the City movie, unless I subtly sneak some into the theater in a nondescript bottle of some kind. Except now that I’ve mentioned the idea to the World Wide Web, I’m sure they’ll be keeping an eye out for me. Rats. I guess I can just go to the after party at Torch instead. On May 30, they’ll have champagne for the first 50 ladies, $5 cosmos and flirtinis, and even $5 dirty martinis for the Mr. Bigs. Now if only they had $5 Jimmy Choos. — Susan Cohen

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