Why is the GOP infatuated with Nikki Haley?

There are some relationships I just can’t seem to understand.

Mad Men bombshell Christina Hendricks and her geeky hubby Geoffrey Arend of the new procedural Body of Proof.

American Idol‘s Jennifer Lopez — a.k.a. People magazine’s most beautiful woman in the world — and Latin music superstar Marc Anthony, who has the dead-eyed, gaunt-faced look of a heroin addict.

And the GOP and Nikki Haley.

Seriously, I don’t get it. What is it about this scandal-plagued stair-climber that Republican Party power players in D.C. find so fascinating? I mean, the lady is damaged goods.

She repeatedly failed to pay her taxes.

She either lied about her salary on an application to the Lexington Medical Center or lied about her salary on her income tax forms.

She fired the largest benefactor in University of South Carolina history, Darla Moore, from the school’s board of trustees, a move that took many by surprise. Following the ensuing public outcry, Haley then professed to nationally syndicated columnist Kathleen Parker that Moore was ousted because she failed to meet with Haley and return her phone calls. But that’s not how it went down. As The State reported last week, recently released records indicate that the governor had offered Moore’s post to a campaign contributor days after taking office and had even sent a letter to Moore notifying her of her termination long before the former trustee’s people canceled a meeting with the governor.

And Haley continues to spin the lie that the GOP attacked her by going public with allegations that she had an affair with FITSNews’ Will Folks and GOP consultant Larry Marchant only after she became the frontrunner in the 2010 race for the SCGOP gubernatorial nomination. The trouble is that Haley knew that Free Times reporter Corey Hutchins was set to publish a piece on the allegations before the poll putting Nikki in the lead was conducted.

Seriously, guys. You like this gal? Why?

Actually, I get it. Haley’s an Indian American. And a woman. And despite the best efforts of the backwoods, knuckle-dragging good ole boy bigots in South Carolina to defeat her, she won the governor’s race. Yay progress!

But the truth of the matter is that the GOP and the national mainstream media have latched onto this narrative, and they don’t want to let it go, no matter how much bad press about Gov. Haley comes out. For them, every negative story the media runs about her is just further proof of how the GOP establishment — and the state’s aforementioned population of bigots — is afraid of this rising-star governor, who is both a woman and minority.

The folks that believe this narrative are fools of the first order. Clowns of the Clueless Cluck Clan. Asshats of the intellectually dishonest apocalypse. And at the forefront is Fox News contributor and syndicated columnist Charles Krauthammer.

In a column last week sizing up the 2012 GOP presidential field, Krauthammer had the misguided audacity to proclaim that Nikki Haley is a good presidential candidate for the GOP in 2016. (Hell, it’s increasingly becoming clear that Haley may even have her sights on 2012.)

Look, we know that Nikki has ambitions beyond South Carolina. She’s writing a memoir after only a few months in office for Pete’s sake, and she recently met with an Israeli economic development group in Florida to discuss, I don’t know, how to increase her national profile. Most notably, she will seemingly talk to every national news outlet that calls while dodging interview requests from media outlets back home.

Here’s the thing, folks: Haley is clearly suffering from delusions of grandeur. She has one too many strikes against her, and I didn’t even list them all out. And although the national press is too timid to attack her right now, in 2016 things will be quite different if she enters the presidential race.

The GOP would be wise not to hitch a ride on this particular shooting star. It’s destined for a flameout.