BLOTTER O’ THE WEEK: In a domestic dispute between a mother and daughter, it was reported that the mother threw a can of Red Bull, a pot, and a phone at her daughter, who responded by throwing a spoon, a plate, and a toaster at her mother. When police arrived, each was reaching for the kitchen sink.

After getting out of a taxi, a man realized he had left his cell phone in the vehicle. While he was reaching back in the taxi, the driver began to drive off and ran over his foot. When the driver heard the man call out, he reversed the car, running over the man’s foot a second time. Realizing his error, the driver sped off, once again running over the man’s foot.

In order to distract a clerk while stealing a bottle of cologne, a man bought a stick of deodorant. The officer asked him to at least use the deodorant before they put him in the back of the squad car.

A man stopped for disorderly conduct said his name was Woody. He also answered Woody when asked where he is from, his date of birth, and at what hotel he was staying.

Refried Threat O’ the Week: “I want you to kick my ass, so I can sue you. I’ll have all your money, and you’ll be eating beans.”

Officers observed a “small amount of taco drippings or vomit” on the front of a man’s shirt. We wonder that same thing every Sunday morning.

Overreaction O’ the Week: An offender asked a man for a cigarette. The victim said he had no cigarettes, prompting the offender to rip the victim’s chain from his neck and shoot him in the shoulder.

Asked how much he had to drink, a man said, “15 beers and 15 bottles of wine.”

A man reported that his home had been broken into. The only stolen item was a marble chess set and its royal blue velvet case.

In a shameless act, a local church’s air conditioning unit was stolen. We hope God has good insurance.

The Blotter is taken from City of Charleston police department reports. We’ve added a cartoon and a little commentary. We’ve added a little humor, too. No one has been found guilty. This is not a court of law.

Stay cool. Support City Paper.

City Paper has been bringing the best news, food, arts, music and event coverage to the Holy City since 1997. Support our continued efforts to highlight the best of Charleston with a one-time donation or become a member of the City Paper Club.