Blotter o’ the Week: On Valentine’s Day, a man stole two containers of frozen crabmeat and a bouquet of flowers from a West Ashley department store. You can make time for romance in the most hopeless circumstances.

An Eastside woman grew nervous after reading about a rash of car break-ins on her neighborhood Facebook page, so she went outside and noticed that her own car had suffered the same fate. Warning well taken.

After several attempts, a man was finally able to successfully shatter a woman’s windshield with a large metal pole from a nearby construction site.

A woman fell for the IRS-is-after-you scam and paid someone with $400 worth of iTunes gift card codes, which makes us really sad.

A CARTA rider kicked the front door of a bus and broke two panels of tempered glass after she was told she wasn’t allowed to bring a drink on the bus.

A man said his security camera caught a “hooded black male” entering his house through the back porch. Officers immediately questioned the man’s black neighbor. When asked about the man next door, the neighbor said, “I don’t know them, some white couple.”

A woman got her tire replaced in West Ashley and, after two of her credit cards were declined, walked outside to “call her bank” before booking it down the street in her newly-serviced car.

A man suspects his drug-addicted roommate of flattening all four of his tires and scribbling a courtesy “FUCK YOU” across the hood of his car.

This week in Victoria’s Secret thefts: an officer stopped two women who hid 13 items of clothing (total value: $652.35) in their purses after a quick trip to the dressing room, which was festooned with torn-off tags.

A man “known to have several mental disorders” has been leaving threatening notes at a law office he believes is preventing him from inheriting his family’s company. One notes calls a partner at the firm a “Bitch Boy LOL.”

Someone opened a fake credit card under a woman’s name and charged $3,431.50 to Saks and Bergdorf Goodman. That’s quite an upgrade from the usual fraudulent charges of $4 at a fast food chain and $47 at a grocery store.

A woman and her fiancée got into a fight over a package of Reese’s cups that led to the man “flying across the room” and knocking over items on a coffee table. This would be kind of funny if he hadn’t kicked her under the chest afterwards.

A man pulled up next to a woman as she was walking into work and yelled, “I’m going to get you,” and “I’ve got something for you,” in the creepiest, most non-consensual game of cat and mouse ever.

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