Reports taken from Dec. 30 to Jan. 5
New year, new stuff
Charleston police on Jan. 2 responded to a West Ashley apartment after residents reported stolen items, including their couch, yoga mat, full-size bed and frame, two dressers, a space heater, five pairs of shoes, two cowboy hats, a Stanley water bottle and more. Forget “new year, new me,” how about “new year, new stuff?” Now all the suspected thief needs is some pots, pans and silverware.
Off to a great start
North Charleston police on Jan. 2 found a man asleep in the driver’s seat of his vehicle on City Hall Lane with a half-full 12 oz. bottle of beer in the cup holder. Police opened the door and put the vehicle in park (no, the vehicle was not already in park), before waking up the man and placing him under arrest for the open container. Happy New Year, man.
Rent-free (well, almost)
The owner of a Mount Pleasant storage facility on Jan. 5 told town police that someone was living in a unit. Officers later found a man who admitted to living in the storage unit that he pays for, since he works close to the facility. There is no note regarding whether the man was “evicted” from the unit, and frankly, we aren’t sure which would be more dystopian.
Maybe a grocery getaway
A North Charleston man on Jan. 3 reportedly had a bit of a meltdown after he was told the self-checkout of an Ashley Phosphate Road grocery store. Police noted the man “did not respond to this information well,” and he stormed out of the store, throwing merchandise across the floor and damaging several pieces of property. Sounds to us like he needed a check-out chill pill.
Better hope that works
Charleston police on Dec. 30 caught a downtown man drunkenly urinating onto North Market Street with an opened bottle of vodka in his jacket pocket. There are several ways to incriminate yourself for public intoxication, and he pretty much ran the gamut. We’re not sure if “new year, new me,” is going to fly in court, but he better hope it does.
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