Reports taken from May 14 to May 16
Hold on, guys
Charleston police on May 14 arrested a man for disorderly conduct near the High Battery wall downtown. While trying to identify him, police said he gave officers several “fictitious” names, like “Superman” and “God.” Wow, guys, we think you were pretty quick to dismiss this whole “God” thing, but we guess we’ll see how it goes.
God bless America
A Mount Pleasant man on May 15 reportedly wearing a red shirt, blue jeans and white shoes stole several meat products and beverages from a Proprietors Place department store. Yes, just in time for that early Memorial Day cookout — there’s nothing more American than shoplifting for the holidays.
‘Custom made’
A downtown woman on May 16 told Charleston police someone apparently stole three bicycles out of her backyard. She was particularly upset about one bike, which she said was “custom made” in China with a frame built from bamboo. OK, the bamboo is cool, but we have some bad news: calling it “custom made” in China does not narrow down the search.
Inflation’s been hard
A downtown woman on May 14 reportedly stole a six-pack of Pepsi, a “single pastry” and two packs of Lifesavers from a Lockwood Boulevard grocery store. Total cost? An astounding $30. The real kicker though, is her getaway car was apparently her grandma’s vehicle, according to a store employee who confronted her outside.
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