Look, I love wildlife. I love it in the fields, the woods, the skies, the streams, in my attic and on my plate. The woodland creatures and I are buddies. Just keep your rabies to yourselves, and we’ll be superfriends. But despite all that love, I just can’t figure out the importance of the following P&C story. I’ll let it speak for itself:

The deer hit by a car writhed in pain and needed to be put out of its misery. But were a dozen or so shots really necessary?

That’s what Audra Luke found herself wondering Tuesday after witnessing a scene on Dorchester Road near Michaux Parkway. The 36-year-old administrative assistant had been on her way to buy supplies from a veterinarian around 1:30 p.m. and was one of the first people to arrive after the accident.

“It was a bit excessive,” Luke said. “It was no less than 12, I can guarantee you that. She emptied her clip and reloaded.”

Two things here: One, 3 paragraphs in and we still don’t know who shot the deer. (We learn that in paragraph five and even then it’s vague). And two, the motorist’s statement that the officer shot the deer at least 12 times is taken as fact. No allegedly. Just taking the claims of an admin at a vet’s office on face value.

Look, I know how we are shocked by stories of animal cruelty; there’s a reason that the video of Motari the alleged puppy tosser has gone viral. But this sounds less like a case of animal cruelty and more like the case of an officer who was simply a bad shot or, hell, too freaked out by the whole dying deer thing to put it out of its misery more expeditiously. (Speaking of the Motari puppy tossing video, Snopes has reason to believe it’s a hoax.

Thanks to the P&C two suspects in a shooting in a Bojangles parking lot have been apprehended. According to the daily, police had failed to adequately investigate the crime, but soon after the P&C ran its report, the cops apparently jumped back on the case. Read it here.

By now you’ve probably heard the reports that one in four girls have an STD, with 20% of all girls having some form of HPV. Scary stuff, yeah. WCBD-TV 2 thought so too.

This scrapbook store is in the business of memories. For owner Elise Wisner, her memories included a painful one. A family member contracted HPV. When this mother of five hears the latest statistics… it is personal.

Actually, it’s personal for a lot of people, more than you think? Or should I rephrase that, more than you’re willing to admit. According to the CDC:

Most people never even know they have HPV or that they are passing it to their partner. For this reason, it may not be possible to know who gave you HPV or when you got it. HPV is so common that most people get it soon after they start having sex.

Most people? Can we get a figure on that?

At least 50% of sexually active people will have genital HPV at some time in their lives.

I don’t know about you, but with half of all sexually active people (that means folks that have sex, either like rabbits or an old married couple) shouldn’t we be a little relieved that only 20% of teenage girls have HPV, which in case noboby’s told you, can be passed on without sexual intercourse.

And kudos to the staff of the Charleston Mercury who found a clever way to get back at us with a little jab we took at them in the Best of Charleston 2008. See, we made fun of their crossword puzzle, The Mercury Wizard, not to mention their roster of very special correspondents, so it’s fitting that the Salmon Sheets devotes this week’s crossword to us. The theme for this week’s Wizard: Lovin’ the Clintons (the Way CCP Does). The clue for Across No. 3: Likely voted by CCP “Best Moral Leaders for Nation.” Classic. Seriously. Hats off.

That said, Clinton? We’re Obama people (and Paul people and Nader people and hell probably even McCain.)

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