Steve Stegelin

Blotter o’ the week: “I think I just shot myself” is a phrase you never want to say, but that’s what one West Ashley man told dispatchers when a round exploded as he examined an old rifle given to him by his grandfather. The victim was hit by a piece of shrapnel and was found, very much alive, sitting in a lawn chair outside his apartment.

Have you ever seen a soft top Jeep and thought they would be really easy to break into? Apparently they are, as one Cainhoy man learned when someone stole $10 from his. The back passenger side window, held together with a zipper, was removed and left on the ground.

A West Ashley woman found several containers holding over 100 pills sitting in her grill on her back porch one evening. The complainant was not aware of how they got there, and officers confiscated the materials to be destroyed. If they had just started up the grill, they could have gotten rid of the pills and discovered that burgers can treat depression.

At a downtown apartment building, officers received noise complaints about music and conversation. After telling the group to “be mindful of their neighbors,” police received another complaint from the same apartment almost two hours later. You can’t stop the rock, officers.

While on patrol, an officer noticed a vehicle stopped in the middle of an intersection with the driver asleep at the wheel. Either he looked very peaceful or intimidating because the officer waited for back-up before waking him.

Officers were alerted to possible credit card fraud when a local woman stated that $550 was removed from her Cash App by someone with the username $MoneyyyBaggg23. Soon after reporting this to Cash App, a user whose name included “MoneyBagz” requested $400 from her, which she declined. Confirmed: People with obnoxious usernames do awful things.

Unknown individuals broke into a hotel downtown on May 4. They were observed on camera rummaging through the gift shop and taking unknown items before exiting the building. Who knew maps of the peninsula and books about plantation life have such a high street value.

A calculator and a phone were stolen from an unlocked vehicle downtown. A calculator’s basically a phone that can’t call, text, access the internet, keep a calendar or use apps.

Three incidents chalked up as “flim-flams” were noted in West Ashley and downtown over the last two weeks. Each had unknown individuals trying to confuse a cashier by asking them to make change several times for large bills, ending with the cash register short on money. Could it be serial flim-flammery? Could it be a flim-flam syndicate? Either way, we get to say “flim-flam” a lot.

A woman called the police on her two sons because she believed they were overdosing after taking five (yes, five) tabs of acid. One was transported to MUSC thanks to his “manic state,” flailing his arms and speaking in gibberish. The report doesn’t say what the other was doing, so we assume he was being chill. No other narcotics were found in the house, presumably because these kids already did them all.

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